Mirror, Mirror, Enemy on the Wall - A1

Verse 1

Mirror, mirror, once my friend on the wall,
Now you’re my enemy after all.
Who hit the “Expand All” button on me?

Bags.
Wrinkles.
Cankles in the mix.
Gravity keeps pulling every dirty trick.

Hair a-thinning,
Thighs go clap, clap, clap,
The pride of my stride has fallen off the map.
Mascara’s fighting for its life tonight.

From beauty queen runner-up
To, “Ma’am… I recommend a wider booth.”

Pre-Chorus

My man’s still got that Cary Grant grin,
That Clark Gable swagger baked right in.
He walks in like a movie star,
While I negotiate all parking spots.

Chorus

Mirror, mirror, hanging on the wall,
Now you’re my enemy after all.
Why’d I have to fall so far?
I paint the lips, I fake the glow,
Spanx are losing to the overflow.

I bought the dress… the dress bought time.
The zipper filed for overtime.
Mirror, mirror on every wall,
Tell me true… what happened to me?
Why’d you turn on me and change the view?

Verse 2

I became the waddling duck,
He somehow still runs on charm.
Every room still turns his way,
Then lands on me with curious eyes.

We used to fit like hand in glove.
Now strangers ask, “Is that true love?”
We were calendar material…
Now we’re the “before and after” viral.

Bridge

Some days my face declares defeat.
My knees applaud with every creak.
My hips got rhythm of their own.
Even my shadow’s overgrown.

If confidence burned calories,
I’d be a size three by today.
Instead, I’m making peace with cake…
One glorious slice at a time.

Final Chorus

Mirror, mirror, once my friend on the wall,
Now you’re my enemy after all.
Who hit the “Expand All” button after all?
From beauty queen runner-up
To, “Please request a wider booth.”

Still I laugh before I cry.
Still I wink and still I try.
If life’s gonna roast me anyway,
I’m stealing every punchline back today.

Mirror, mirror on the wall…
At least I’m still the funniest one of all.